Today, Tatler Magazine published The Diary of George Windsor: How George is Feeling About Becoming a Big Brother, leaving no stone unturned when it comes to weighing the pros and cons of competing for mum’s attention.
According to Prince George‘s diary, his court was present when the Duchess of Cambridge came to deliver good tidings of a fetus. His PR team was present, as was his stylist, hair and makeup, his “diary secretary” and his Latin teacher, who helpfully translated Catherine’s news.
Kensington Palace, September 2014
Today Mummy came into my nursery and said she had an announcement to make. My PR team were present, as were my diary secretary, my stylist, hair and make-up and my Latin teacher. ‘Mummy has a baby in her tummy,’ she said tentatively. (‘Habet mater infantem in ventre,’ my Latin teacher repeated.) ‘A brother to be your best friend, or a sister for you to look after, like the Beckham boys look after Harper. Either outcome is a good result for your media profile.’ Everyone nodded in agreement.
On the one hand, George reasoned, he is the heir so this kid is just going to be the spare, like Uncle Harry. On the other hand, what if this sibling has mummy’s hair and George is left with hair like dad? What if this sibling is a boy and he flirts with mummy in a way that makes daddy sad?
“Uncle Harry and Mummy laugh hysterically about things Daddy doesn’t understand,” George wrote. “And when they talk in their secret language, he looks sad.”
Valid points all around, and it’s admirable for George to admit these fears, albeit in a diary that no one in the world but his diary secretary can read.
“I have to go now,” the Prince finally wrote. “My food-taster has pronounced my rusk safe and then I’m seeing my shrink.”
To understand the magnitude of this news in full, and just how heavily this weighs on podgy little George, head over to Tatler.
While you’re at it, head to your nearest international newsstand or Barnes & Noble for the latest issue. Why? Because there’s a princess on the cover (also it’s a very entertaining magazine that’s been around for more than 300 years).