Right, so when you wake up, Your Royal Highness, please allow me and Visit Britain to show you all the wonderful places in the United Kingdom.
I’ll just draft up a lovely little guide so that you can read it at your leisure, ma’am. I’ve heard that one’s entrance into the world is a bit traumatic (scientific theories and whatnot), and no doubt you’re settling down at Norfolk with a nice
cup of tea bottle before bedtime.
Where were we? Yes, Great Britain! All of the glorious points of interest steeped in history folklore and boasting natural beauty. Let’s get on with it.
Nicknamed “KP,” the palace is actually made up of several private apartments, as well as the King and Queen’s apartments, a public wing for visitors to learn all about your ancestors. This will be your official residence, which is kind of cool given that dad and Uncle Harry lived here when they were kids. Your neighbors include Prince and Princess Michael of Kent, the latter of whom is a real gas and a great storyteller.
If you drive 2.5 hours northeast from London, you’ll come across great-granny’s family estate, Sandringham, which has been in your family for 150 years.
Her Majesty was nice enough to gift mummy and dad with Anmer Hall, a 10-bedroom home on the grounds, which you’ll come to cherish because NATURE.
You’ll be able to spend Christmas with your cousins, uncle and other extended family members. No luck on dining with the adults until you can properly hold a fork and knife, though.
Just look at all of the gorgeous places you can visit in Norfolk, which some have dubbed “The Royal Coast.”
Your namesake city is also home to one of the world’s oldest and most prestigious universities, founded in 1209. Your grandfather, the Prince of Wales, earn a bachelor of arts degree from the University of Cambridge before serving in the Royal Navy.
Mummy and dad lived up in Anglesey, Wales while daddy was a Search and Rescue pilot, and to this day they reminisce about their time spent in a quaint farmhouse by the Irish sea.
“I know that I speak for Catherine when I say that I have never in my life known somewhere as beautiful and as welcoming as Anglesey,” William said in the summer of 2013 before he and his family returned to London. “Both of us will miss it terribly when my Search & Rescue tour of duty comes to an end.”
Scotland, my dear, holds many a memory for your parents. You’ll learn about their love story as you grow up, which started at St. Andrews University.
You’ll also get a chance to visit great-granny’s summer home (Her Majesty’s court moves there from mid-July to October), Balmoral Castle. This was purchased by your great-great-great-great-great grandfather, Prince Albert for his wife and your great-great-great-great-great grandmother, Queen Victoria in 1852.
Situated in the heart of Edinburgh along the Royal Mile (where great-granny goes for official duties) lies the Palace of Holyroodhouse. Your father’s cousin, Zara Phillips got married in Edinburgh in 2011, and held her reception at the palace.
You’ll notice the city’s namesake castle, a dominating presence up on a bluff which is now open to tourists.
You’ll probably come to love this area of Berkshire very much. Great-granny considers Windsor Castle her “home,” despite Buckingham Palace being her official residence. When your father attended nearby Eton College, he would cross the bridge to have tea with Her Majesty.
Finally, we arrive back in London, the city of your birth and the place from which your father (and brother, after him) will rule. Your family will live in Buckingham Palace, and you’ll take part in many an historical engagement, including Trooping of the Colour, which marks the monarch’s official birthday, as well as Remembrance Sunday, a moving ceremony in which Great Britain and Commonwealth countries remember those who lost their lives in battle.
You’ll do great, kid. Spend time with your Uncle Harry, who has carved quite a path for himself despite being dubbed “the spare.” Be nice to people, remember the legacy laid out before you, and pay attention to stories about your late grandmother, the Princess of Wales. She was a firecracker, and her generosity knew no bounds.
Ok, that is all.
VisitBritain is a national tourism agency responsible for inspiring the world to explore Britain and for developing the UK’s visitor economy. Did you know that us yanks made up 2.8 million visits to Britain in 2013 and spent $4.17 billion USD (£2.54 billion).
Thinking of popping across the pond for a visit? VB’s website provides information for tourists, plus money and time-saving tasks like planning local transport, as well as purchasing attraction, theatre and tour tickets.