12 Times Prince George Regretted His Outfit Choices

Prince George Different Wardrobe Looks Lead Image

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His Royal Highness, Prince George Alexander Louis of Cambridge, turns 2 today, and it’s anybody’s guess how he’ll spend it.  Perhaps putting another X on the “Days ‘Til I’m a King Like Simba” calendar, or perhaps sticking Legos into his little sister’s ear to see if it will come out the other.

Either way, grandma Middleton will decorate the venue with whatever theme little boys are into these days – Thomas the Tank Engine?  Henry VIII’s court?  “Splendid display, pleb,” he’ll tell Carole.  “Next time, please be sure that the bunting is made on tapestries rather than paper.  This isn’t some knees-up in Berkshire.”

Prince George Wombat Governor-General

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To celebrate 730 days of George, let’s go inside the mind of a young gentleman to discover what he really thinks of those outfits. 

1. “I find it interesting that the three of you are standing there laughing as I sit here in a dress.  A.  Dress.”

Royal Rota photograph by John Stillwell/PA /Distributed by Ian Jones Photography

Royal Rota photograph by John Stillwell/PA /Distributed by Ian Jones Photography

2. “Good sir, boats do not a masculine onesie make.”

Prince William Holds Prince George Sydney Airport

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3.  “Catherine made me wear cashmere.  I told here there was a lot of manure at the polo field.”

Prince George Blue Cardigan Festival of Polo Tetbury

James Whatling/Splash News

4. “Does anyone out there want this ‘vintage’ POS?  The fabric isn’t breathable, but apparently dad wore it once upon a time (see what I did there?).”

Prince George Kate Middleton Wave Buckingham Palace Balcony

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5. “Just…please pick me up.  These knee socks are the final nail in the coffin.”

Prince George Wants Carried By Prince William

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6. “You lied to me.  You said that this was MY special day and that I could wear whatever I fancied.  Does this embroidered shirt say ‘manly’ to you?”

Prince George Cries Holds William's Hand

Matt Dunham/WPA-Pool

7. ” You put me in this get-up, I give you split ends.”

Prince George Grabs Kate Middleton Hair Plunket

James Whatling / i-Images / Pool

8.  “Who wears these shoes in the country? I nearly twisted my ankle chasing after a horse!”

Prince George Squirms Cirencester Polo Club

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9.  “Mr. Bilby, I’ll give you New Zealand if you eat my shoes.”

Prince George Sees Bilby Sydney Zoo

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10. “My smile says I make these knee socks look good, but inside I long to free my calves from this prison.”

Prince George Christmas Vest Knee Socks Kensington Palace

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11. “Catherine, my hair is standing up.  CATHERINE, MY HAIR.”

Prince George Red Sweater Kate Middleton Airplane

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12. “Ma’am, might I have a word about my wardrobe allowance?  I feel this outfit doesn’t represent who am I and what I’ve achieved in just two short years.”

Prince George Speaks Queen Elizabeth II St Mary Magdalene Church

Matt Dunham/WPA-Pool

 

“It’s one’s f—ing day.”

 

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